I was very encouraged last month to learn that we had moved up a whopping ten (!) spots on the waiting list. The month of November, however…Nada. In this crazy world in which we live, I am always a bit nervous that any day, something (or someone) might happen, putting an end to international adoptions alltogeher. So the wait is necessary, but hard in the midst of so much uncertainty, even instability. There are no guarantees that our dream of welcoming two more children into our family through adoption will be fulfilled. Such is life – there are few guarantees.
And so we remain #47 on the waiting list, up 20 spots since we were added to the list in July.
Four years ago this week, we met our son for the first time, and we are celebrating that this week, his 4th famiversary. Coming home at eight months old, he will not remember a time when I was not his mom. But I do. Just as I have this past year, I filled out forms and mailed documents and read adoption blogs, but mostly I just thought of him. And us. Together. I remember Christmas 2008 was the hardest season of waiting. I remember crying at seemingly-inappropriate times while listening to Christmas hymns. Maybe because Christmas seems like the time of year that families should be together. More likely, though, because the Christmas season itself is a time of waiting – for a child even – and of great expectation.
Then there he was. And there we were. And by Christmas 2009 we were a family of four. And this Christmas 2013 we remain a family of four, but we are waiting on two more. Adoption, like life, may have few guarantees, but one thing I’m sure of is that these kids, like my son, are totally worth the wait.
Another thing I’m sure of is God’s love. For me. For the whole world. To Him, we are worth it. If it weren’t for this Love, there would be no Christmas, no great expectation, no hope. But because of this Love, there is.